The Hulk's Help
by Iresol
Summary: A one shot of after the movies ending.


Authors Note, Ok, I'll admit it, I rather enjoy the Hulk. Especially the ending when he gets all green on their ass down in the jungle. I even like that beard, any who, I got back from school and got to thinking…..so anyway, here's a little stupid thing I typed up this one shot after the ending in the jungle. With our boy Bruce, a few army dudes and of course the three very helpful missionaries. 

Major Sanchez had been sent by General Ross to investigate an _appearance _ down in the jungles of South America, while it seemed like nothing more then a hoax, like all the others. The photographs of the damage couldn't be ignored.

The last sighting was in a rather tiny village that took three days on foot to get to. Sanchez was blown away by the damage Banner had left behind, he'd lucked out that no one was harmed and that there were witnesses, and that three of them had actually come face to face with Banner.

Sanchez tracked the three down and was quite surprised to find they were three teenage girls, all on a mission trip with their church.

"So then I was like_, Oh my God_, and he was like _Roooaaaar_, and I was like _Holy Shit_!" Lily told the young army man who stood with a pen and pad, he had tracked then down while they rebuilt a well.

Beside her stood Yvette and Fiona a native N.Y.Rican and a native Brit, Yvette stirred the cement while Fiona held the open bag. Sanchez stared at the young blonde girl who was a spokeswoman for cheerleaders of America. "When you saw the Hulk did he say anything?"

Yvette watched from under her ringlets while Lily nodded, "Yeah, he went, _Rooaarr._"

Sanchez rubbed his nose and pushed his glasses up his face, the sweat was horrible and the heat unbearable. The Hulk would fit it perfect in such a hellhole in his opinion. But before he found the beast he had to put up with this bimbo.

He looked to the girl with the afro and asked, "What about you?"

"She doesn't speak English," Lily told him.

Fiona lifted her black eyebrows and smirked, when Sanchez looked to her Lily told him, "She's still too emotionally distraught, she's never seen such a "big hot" dog before, she's still stunned."

Sanchez took a calming breath and shoved the glasses on his nose, "When you saw him did he do anything?"

Lily looked to Yvette real quick who gave her a encouraging nod, Lily then said, "He was all _Roooaarr _ and then he like ran around like a chicken with his head chopped off. So I was like _Oh my god_ and he was all _rrooaarr _ and like Frankenstein or something."

Sanchez though about beating her with the pad, he hadn't found out anything other then the Hulk had roared. Sanchez looked at the blonde girl, "How long did he run before he go away?"

Lily looked to Yvette, "Like what…"

The two best friends had a secret language and ten years in private catholic school. Yvette spoke in a language they both knew, "Fünf minutenzeiger."

"Nein, es war lang."

Yvette rolled her eyes, Lily knew her friend didn't care what she said, so she turned to Sanchez, "Like ten minutes."

Sanchez stared at Yvette, "Was she speaking German?"

Lily quickly lied, "Dutch, she's Amish."

"Beissen sie mich," Yvette told Sanchez, well aware he my have spoken German. Fiona poured a little extra that made Yvette turn back to the stirring.

"So the Hulk just ran around in circles and roared for ten minutes?"

Lily nodded, "Uh-huh."

"And then what?"

"Then he was like _Grrrrrrrrrrrr _ and I was like _ahhhhhhhh_ and he was all green and stuff, and we were like, to hell with this and we high tailed it outta there Mr. Army man."

Sanchez closed his empty pad and smiled, "Well thank you girls, you have been most helpful."

"Did you want my phone number?" Lily asked.

Sanchez shook his head, "There's no need. Enjoy your trip."

The three girls watched him walk off to his jeep and leave. In a heavy New England accent Yvette asked, "You think he believed us?"

"God I hope so, you did good Lily, that theater class really paid off." Fiona added.

Lily grinned and with her true southern twang grinned, "Tha shithead thinks we'ra buncha flimsy gurls, asswipe. I shoulda put pebbles in is gas tank."

"I already did that," Yvette smiled then waved to the jeep as it drove by.

"Lets just hope that fine piece of ass made it farther then Sanchez does." Fiona mused, remembering the man they had helped earlier.

Both girls nodded, "He was fine."

**What really happened……**

"Dude, I think he's dead," Fiona told her two friends while Yvette investigated the unconscious man. Fiona stood back, not wanting to be anywhere close incases he woke up and bit them.

Yvette shook her head, "His pulse is racing…I think he's high." Beside Yvette knelt Lily, she lifted the mans face in her hand and tapped his face, the mans face was flushed. His hair was soaked with sweat and soaked to his face and neck.

"Does he have track marks?" Fiona asked, her arms crossed she stood a few feet aside, but watched curiously.

Yvette took his hand and looked over his wrist, then the other and then both his feet, "No."

"Do ya think he's tha man those people're lookin for?" Lily asked her blue eyes on the mans face, as soon as the words were out of her mouth he moved. Fiona shrieked and jumped back.

Both girls were surprised to see the intensity in his brown eyes. "Good morning, do you know your name?" Yvette asked him, her voice calm but not demeaning.

He took a deep breath and looked around, "Where am I?"

"South America, don't ask what town because we don't even know," Fiona told him.

"Dude, I think you should get to a Doctor," Yvette told him.

"Dude I saw'im yesterday. That mans tha Doc." Lily told her best friend. Yvette rolled her eyes, "Ok then, you may wanna grab your shit and high tail it outta

here, the military has sent men over here."

The man looked at the girl and spoke softly, "Thanks."

A thought came to Fiona, "What size are you?"

All three heads looked to her, quickly she explained, "Well if people are looking for him he needs to shave his beard, get a hair cut and get dressed. I'll go steal him some of Pastor Dave's shit, but I need to know his damn size."

"Your'a genius," Lily told her.

"I know," Fiona admitted.


End file.
